“If I Could”

If I could, every morning I would bring you a flower. Not just any flower. I would bring you the purple orchid. Yes, the one you held in your final hour.

If I could, I would take back every word I uttered against you. I would forever hold on to your hugs, tears, smiles and laughter. I miss you so much. I wish you were here. I long for your words, your discipline and your soft touch.

I miss your voice, your hair and the reflection of love in your eyes. I miss your look of anger when I told little white lies.

In your memory, I visit your grave. I bring you a purple orchid and I look up at the skies. Sometimes they are grey but more often blue. If I stare long enough, I see an image of you. Sometimes there is rain and I pray that it washes away my pain.

I miss you, mom.